I’m back! Our moms went on vacation and took my computer with them. I would have used our person that’s away at college [but home for the summer]’s fancy computer, but if you remember my last post – from eons ago – our sister, Ethel, has laid claim to our person’s bedroom and won’t let me in!
You see, our plan to fortify the staircase with The General’s troops to keep Ethel out of our person that’s away at college’s bedroom was a complete failure.
Fortunately for The General, his forces sustained no losses, though there were a number of casualties. Unfortunately, Ethel is still occupying the room and keeping all of us out!
I’m sure you’re wondering, with such thoughtful strategizing, how did Ethel manage? It’s embarrassing to admit, but she outwitted all of us.
You see, the General and I waited for our moms and person to go to work. Then we enlisted Eggnog and Walter to help us station the troops, working towards the top of the stairs. We put the majority of The General’s forces at the bottom of the steps feeling quite confident that our strategy would work.
When Ethel left her room to head upstairs, she came face-to-face with The General’s cavalry.
It wasn’t pretty. Ethel cursed The General up one side and down the other. She tried to crawl over the troops, but her gut got stuck on the giant frog. As she flailed around, crushing The General’s battalion, we held our breath hoping they could sustain the effort.
Surprisingly, they held her off! Ethel cursed us all and went back to her room declaring she’d be back to try again.
The General and I conferred and decided to leave the soldiers at their stations pending Ethel’s return. And that decision ultimately led to our downfall when…
LOUD Mom came home from work.
She saw the soldiers and chastised Sherman for making such a mess. She put all three furry beasts outside and was getting ready to pick up the soldiers when here comes Ethel.
Ethel rubbed up against LOUD Mom’s legs, then threw herself on the troops in agony. LOUD Mom, ever the sucker, assured Ethel that she was cleaning up the mess. But Ethel wouldn’t stop. In fact, her wailing increased.
Then it happened.
LOUD Mom asked Ethel if she was trying to get up to our person that’s away at college’s room. Were all of The General’s “toys” [sic] blocking her way? Ethel got quiet and started purring, looking up at LOUD Mom imploringly. And the Oscar goes to….
That’s when LOUD Mom picked Ethel up and carried her – yes, CARRIED her – to our person’s bedroom. To make matters worse, when Little Mom and our person that’s away at college [but home for the summer] came home, LOUD Mom informed them of the whole ordeal. Everyone gathered around Ethel petting her and comforting her. Our person even told Ethel she could sleep with her that night!!! And ever since then, they’ve been carrying Ethel upstairs giving her sole access to our person’s bedroom. It’s awful.
Time to get creative. I have an idea, but it’s going to take outside assistance. And not from Baby Girl – I don’t think she’d approve. I can’t tell you now – it’s too early – but I’ll share more as soon as I’m able. Wish me luck!