Sleeping with the Enemy

Sherman-01_profileHello, this is The General. My sister Carol is so busy keeping tabs on the comings and goings here that she’s neglected her blog. She claims she has her paws full with keeping us in order with our moms traveling more frequently, but that’s a bunch of cockamamie. If one of my troops failed to report for duty for months on end, I’d give them the boot!

While Carol frets over keeping tabs on that these limp noodles here, I’m dealing with a mutiny. Apparently some of my soldiers think Eggnog – Eggnog! – is a better leader than yours truly. What nonsense!

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Is this the face of a Leader?

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Now that’s more like it!

Before you accuse me of being a male chauvinist dog, hear me out. I’m tired of that little fluffball getting everyone’s sympathy! Eggnog’s the ONLY one in this house that sleeps in the bed with our moms, Eggnog’s the ONLY one that isn’t crated when our humans aren’t home, and Eggnog’s the ONLY one our moms take with them when they visit Grandpa (while the rest of us stay home with a “pet” sitter – the humiliation!).

Eggnog has all of these suckers feeling sorry for her while she lives in high cotton! But not me. I see through her machinations.

eggnog-suffering

See how terribly she suffers. Give me a break!

You might hear all of this and say Eggnog sounds like a brilliant leader. Maybe she is – if you think politicians make great leaders with all of their scheming and backroom deals. I, however, prefer to honor leaders with excellent moral character. Great men like General Sherman and Ronald Reagan.

It’s all very troubling. Every morning I come downstairs to find another of my soldiers has defected and joined Eggnog’s camp. First it was Lieutenant Dan – but given his history of hard living, I wasn’t too troubled by losing him.

mutiny_lieutenant-dan

Look at Eggnog’s face. Caught red-pawed!

Next came Private Rick, a young lad who I knew was easily influenced. So I shrugged off that one, too.

mutiny_private-rick

But then came the sock in the gut – Colonel Sanders, my trusted advisor that I called friend had turned coat.

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How could he? And to think I called him friend.

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The Colonel and me during better times.

That’s when I knew I had a problem on my paws. Swift action was required.

My first course of order was to submit a formal request to the Joint Chiefs of Staff requesting re-relocation of my troop basket.

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You need not remind me that the prior request resulted in the basket being moved to its current sub-par location. Frankly, given my current situation, I would submit to the troop basket being returned to its original spot.

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While terribly inconvenient for a canine of size like myself, at least in its prior location the troops are shielded and do not have a direct line to the enemy’s camp.

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Second, I recruited my brother, Walter, to conduct an investigation into the matter. I know, I know. Walter’s afraid of his own shadow, yet I’m sending him across enemy lines. But I’m a General and I know how to motivate – I promised Walter that if he completes his task successfully, I’ll stop calling him a ninny. As much.

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Ninny.

And, finally, I instituted a propaganda campaign in an attempt to stem the tide.

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It’s too soon to tell if my efforts will be fruitful, but I’m optimistic.

34 thoughts on “Sleeping with the Enemy

  1. General, good to see you back. Real leaders seem to come and go these days, and the good ones are being overshadowed by the those who talk a big story but have no capacity to follow through. Your situation seems to be mirroring the chaos happening in human society…this searching that so many humans are forced into for some sort of meaning and guidance. Confusion is rampant. I hope that you can regain control. Your example will serve to stabilize and reinforce order, and perhaps carry over into human social interactions as well.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Hello, Deb! The General here. You seem to understand my situation perfectly. All I want is a little order in my world, but chaos reigns. If only these youngsters would listen to me! Why won’t they listen? I’m The General! I hate to admit it, but I’m dumbfounded. They have it so good with me, why would they defect to the enemy? But don’t worry! I’m no sissy. I won’t give up that easily!

      Liked by 2 people

  2. General, I am so sorry to hear of your problems and with Eggnog, no less! That is not the sweater of a leader. BTW, in light of Colonel Sander’s history of loyalty, are you positive he has defected? Is there any possibility that he was caught while infiltrating enemy territory, while gaining intel?

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Well General, it would seem that things are getting just a TAD out of control in the battlefield since we had the last update…..your request to relocate the troops certainly is understandable…..reinforce the walls, fortify the encampments, and above all, make sure the traitors and would-be traitors know they will face the wrath of the General should they waiver or jump ship. Eggnog does not look General-worthy. That sweater is proof of that. I suggest that you continue your campaign for troop relocation and do some further questioning of Col. Sanders and the other possible traitors because it IS possible there was some re-con going on rather than ship-jumping. Your troops have always been loyal to you…..and as someone else mentioned, your uniforms are way more stylish!

    Waiting for further info…….
    Sammy

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for your support, Sammy. In distressing times like this, when you don’t know who you can and can’t trust, your words of encouragement go a long way. I will forge on and get to the bottom of this situation, come heck or high water!!!

      Like

  4. General–I have so missed all of you so even though this is a rather distressing post, it is so good to hear from you. I do have to wonder about your troops defecting to Eggnog’s side. Surely, they know better than that. I wonder if something else is going on instead. Not sure what, but thinks do not seem to be kosher, if you know what I mean. I would not worry about Eggnog; I doubt she poses any serious threat to someone like you. I would definitely have a quiet little chat with Carol…She might have more than she can handle. Carry on, General; I know you will do well.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hello! So you think things may not be as they seem? You’re not alone — maybe you’re all onto something! I’d better light a fire under Walter to help me figure this out. Of course that will just scare him! I’ll bet the first General Sherman didn’t face nearly the kind of struggles I have to endure!!

      Like

  5. Hello, General, nice to meetcha. As the Leader in my home, I understand perfectly what you are going through. My opinion only, but have you considered that the Colonial has been taken prisoner? It may be time to move in for a rescue when heads are turned. Just looking at you, I know you will win this battle, as well as the war. Lead on!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hello, General Lexi! I hadn’t considered that Sanders might be a POW. That Eggnog isn’t to be trusted, so you might be on the right track! Clearly with that kind of razor-sharp thinking you’re no nimwit when it comes to the dark side of war. Thanks for weighing in — your wise counsel is deeply appreciated!

      Liked by 1 person

  6. It was so good to see your post General. Stay strong and don’t lose heart – I feel the troops do want structure and will return to your command with their respective tales between their legs. I think your relocation plans are well conceived and I hope you are successful at acheiving this measure. Best of luck and I await your next update.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you! I’m still awaiting a response from the Joint Chiefs. Carol repeatedly reminds me they have more important matters to attend to now. Clearly she doesn’t understand the gravity of my situation! No worries, though. I’m steadfast in my convictions and will get my troops in line…. once I hear back from my moms.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. General, your face alone brings confidence in your leadership abilities – how could anyone resist that strong jaw and THOSE eyebrows? Plus as mentioned previously, your handwriting is the pawmanship of a born leader. I am sure you will restore order to the troops and I too feel that Col. Sanders may be in dire need of your prompt rescue. Lead on!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Why thank you for your compliments! My moms tell me I’m handsome all the time, but they say the same thing to Walter. Walter!

      With no word coming forth from the Joint Chiefs, and my useless brother Walter too scared to infiltrate Eggnog’s camp, I’ve been forced to go it alone. But I will get to the Truth and restore order once and for all!

      Liked by 1 person

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