Better to fight for something, than live for nothing!

Sherman-01_profileHello, this is The General. I recently learned about the humiliations contained in Carol’s last post. What nerve she has telling the world how I got stuck in the secret door! In my defense, that door was made for a cat. A cat! Do you know how squishy cats can be?

steve-jello-abs

So my getting stuck should come as no surprise. Heck, I’m PROUD I got stuck! What kind of pathetic dog would I be if I didn’t?

Do they want me to be like this skinny nincompoop?!

Sadly, not everyone sees it that way. Continue reading

The Great Debate

Hello. For those of you that don’t know me, my name is Carol. I’m a cat and this is my blog. Tonight I am moderating a debate between my brothers, Walter and Sherman [aka The General], and our outside neighbor cat [and my personal mentor], Baby Girl. My sister, Eggnog, has graciously agreed to transcribe the debate, so it’s airing nearly Live!

debate-participants

After drawing twigs, the order was determined to be The General, Walter, and Baby Girl. I asked all of my participants to keep the discussion polite and respectful. After all, this is a family blog Continue reading

Fair and Balanced

carol-05_profile-circleWalter and The General are in the middle of what are turning out to be some messy negotiations with the Springhill Ballers. The fellas want to engage the Ballers in their effort to rid our yard of its seedy squirrel element. But the Ballers have a lot of demands that I don’t think the boys can meet, including providing fresh salmon for their annual gangsta picnic (our moms don’t even eat seafood, so how are they going to get their paws on that?!) and meeting 50 Cent in person (even Eggnog doesn’t talk to him anymore – she says he’s not as “relevant” as he once was). I guess time will tell.

The General has taken to watching quite a lot of news lately. I thought he was sleeping with the television on, but he claims he’s just resting his eyes. [His eyes may be resting, but his lungs aren’t – what a snore!]

Not as quiet as he looks.

Also not as quiet as he looks.

The General said he hopes that by learning how humans handle their crises, he’ll be able to develop some alternative strategies Continue reading

A Tribute to My Troops

Sherman-01_profileHello, this is The General. If you’ve followed recent events here, you’re aware of the valiant effort my troops sustained to keep my sister, Ethel, out of our person that’s away at college’s bedroom. You also know that their effort was for naught thanks to human intervention [i.e., LOUD Mom carrying Ethel to the room herself]. In thanks for their selflessness, Carol asked me to dedicate a guest blog post to my troops. 

I would like to introduce to you some of the bravest soldiers amongst my ranks. Their sacrifice and bravery in the face of a formidable foe [i.e., Ethel] are remarkable.

Sergeant Dan

troop-bio_frog

Continue reading

The Siege at Creekview Drive

carol-05_profile-circleI’m back! Our moms went on vacation and took my computer with them. I would have used our person that’s away at college [but home for the summer]’s fancy computer, but if you remember my last post – from eons ago – our sister, Ethel, has laid claim to our person’s bedroom and won’t let me in!

You see, our plan to fortify the staircase with The General’s troops to keep Ethel out of our person that’s away at college’s bedroom was a complete failure.

Fortunately for The General, his forces sustained no losses, though there were a number of casualties. Unfortunately, Ethel is still occupying the room and keeping all of us out!

Ethel on her

This should be ME.

I’m sure you’re wondering, with such thoughtful strategizing, how did Ethel manage? It’s embarrassing to admit, but she outwitted all of us. Continue reading

The Battle of Bull(y) Run

carol-05_profile-circleMy brother, Walter, is one strange bird interviewing himself like that [click here if you missed his guest blog post]. But I suppose that should come as no surprise. Our neighbor, Baby Girl, is still working with my sister, Ethel, on this whole meditation thing. I think she should just give up, but Baby Girl says, “Winners never quit, and quitters never win.” Where does she come up with this stuff?! She’s just SO smart.

The problem is that Ethel now insists that she must meditate in our person that’s away at college [but home for the summer]’s bedroom. Alone. All of the time. Ethel says the room has the best natural daylight and most spirit lifting colors. Continue reading

(Not So) Wordless Wednesday

Sherman-01_profileHello, this is The General. Carol reported to me that many of you are asking for updates on the status of my request for the Joint Chiefs of the Household Headquarters to relocate my troop basket.

After a surprisingly brief discussion on the sofa, while also knitting and watching a true-crime HBO documentary, the Joint Chiefs made a decision. Citing the tendency of the troops to spill out of their basket and clog up the entry way, Little Mom suggested moving them to a more “out of the way” location. Out of the way?! Frankly, I find such callous disregard for my soldiers’ contributions offensive!

Then, LOUD Mom had the audacity to suggest they sort through my troops and GET RID OF the ones I don’t use!!! Continue reading